you are the knife.

by moonish brute

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1.
01:51
2.
02:28
3.
01:24
4.
03:32
5.
01:23
6.
01:23
7.
01:23

about

i wrote and recorded these songs in the spring and summer of 2015, as soon as my friend rob taught me to play guitar. at the end of the summer, my hard drive crashed, taking the uncompressed tracks with it before i could release them.

now that a year's gone by, i'm not as concerned with the quality loss created by converting the MP3s to AIFs or whatever the heck. even the album art i've uploaded is essentially an enlarged thumbnail. this ep is where i started; i'd like to release it the way it is so i can grow musically in a transparent way.

credits

released May 18, 2016

thx to rob, sean, greg, eliot, erin, and my dad, who all heard these songs when i first wrote them and inexplicably encouraged me to continue. also deanne moore, who showed me a poem by rumi that's continued to follow me into unexpected places over many years.

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moonish brute Boston, Massachusetts

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Track Name: fixation
a bendy straw bitten shut
a line picked up and put down again
Track Name: kurôzu-cho
spiral, won't you swallow me?
pull me in your heart.
i'm certain i belong there
in the middle of your art.

is that twisted center
where you end or where you start?
i'll follow you to find out,
lost within the swirling dark.

oh, oh our souls tangle up,
takes more than a knife to sever these knots.
oh, oh you're turning in place,
can't seem to forget the scared look on your face.
Track Name: rumi
the dark thought, the shame,
the malice, the sin—
i will greet you laughing,
i will let you in.

i'll try to learn your lesson
while i wait for you to leave,
but some guests outstay their welcome
and i've been losing sleep.
Track Name: nvm
your father's breath inside of you
sticks in your throat, turns black and blue
you are the knife, the bitter hue
the salt in my mouth when i think about you

your father's flames in your flickering eyes
i can still feel their heat every time you creep by
you are the one who said, "never be surprised"
if the fire catches up, it was just your time

your knowing home looked heavenly
your knowing love swallowing me
pale moon on the skin of a black sea
your knowing love apart from me

(pressed against the side of a twisted monolith
can't help sticking my hand all the way in
fire pulses off your skin, throbs like a vessel
exploding inside of you)

your father's breath inside of you
sticks in your throat, turns black and blue
you are the knife, the bitter hue
the blood in my mouth when i think about you
Track Name: june 4, 2015
rip the light out
leave the wire
strangled copper
cold reminder

rip the light out
heart's a socket
keep a glass piece
in my pocket

are we fighting?
it's so dark here
hard to see you
or keep my head clear

lit a fire
burned my finger
lost the kindling
and the tinder

can't see where this
tunnel's leading
rip the light out
and the leaving

rip the light out
i'll be missing
rip the light out
i am missing
Track Name: hell song
i won't feel better
i won't feel better
til i hurt myself
and everyone else
and everybody else

i won't feel better
i won't feel better
til i hurt myself
and everyone else
i'm taking you to hell

i'm already in hell